I honestly can't remember anybody saying automatic updates are not needed. Really. On the contrary, I remember when a US Senator joked about this very thing on that hearing that Tim Cook (or was it Schiller?) participated... Not having automatic updates was a nuisance, and EVERYBODY knew that. Now, since we're talking about automatic updates, care to talk about how many Android users can automatically update to the latest version of the OS? I know how many did just that on the iOS side...
The whole skeuomorphic thing predates Forstall, and it was Steve's thing. Forstall just ran with it. And again, it was always polarising, never a consensus (either way).
You paint Apple fans as delusional, and I find that a small minority are indeed a bit crazy over their appreciation for all things Apple. But you seem to have us here at WBF confused with those. We tend to be a bit more critical than your average forum out there, and that includes smartphones too.
Apple always had the lead in perceived speed, which is what matters in the end. That speed is achieved through a number of things, software and hardware. So, having a very fast octa-core CPU is meaningless, if your software is crap, like Android is. Add the various third-party UI layers of gunk, and all of a sudden octa-core is the minimum required to get sub-iPhone performance levels. Perhaps that's where you get the idea that Apple users don't give a sh*t about fast processors (I still don't).
Hardly anything you say matches reality, only your own reality, where Apple is the devil incarnate, and its customers are out to get you.
If you have an irrational dislike for Apple, that's fine. You just don't like them or their products, and that's your prerrogative. But don't make up a whole reality around yourself to justify your dislike.
alexandre