Vinegar, baking soda, ammonia, Borax and Pine Sol are your friends right now, along with a lot of scrubbing of everything. Getting rid of smoke smell on walls require a cleaning and/or prime and repaint, there's really no other way around it. In the scope of work I have been involved with in the past, we would have the place vacated [emptied] and would Kilz, then repaint the entire premises including the floor [usually concrete]. Another company would then follow behind us to thoroughly clean every square inch that was not painted. At that point, the A/C ducts would be professionally cleaned, carpet and flooring installed and I do not know what happened to the tenants belongings because their insurance covered that portion. Before moving back in, 3 bottles of industrial air freshener were set in various locations within. We actually had to do this to one house where the tenant had smoked 2 packs a day for 25 years and never opened any windows. No amount of cleaning would have helped that property.
We do not have wild fires out here like I have seen you guys out West getting. Over here, the house or apartment is either a total loss or we did what I had mentioned above. It may have already been mentioned before but try to keep the windows open and fans going, wash whatever it is you can without ruining it, discard things that have permanent smoke damage and take a peek at the thread about mold/musty smells for further suggestions to mask the smell.
I would advise having your friends that are worse off than you contacting their insurance company to see what may or may not be covered prior to doing anything. For you and your son, give your doctor a call to see if something can specifically be done to improve your ailments. My apologies for not having more input than this, fire restoration [other than stove smoke damage] isn't really a specialty of mine due to the fact that it rarely occurred. It may be best to call a professional fire restoration company who specifically deals with this on an ongoing basis for advice. It is also somewhat difficult to offer advice on varying degrees of smoke damage without physically being on the location itself. My apologies for not being as helpful as you were possibly hoping for.
If you have blinds throughout the house, I do have a way of cleaning them thoroughly to brand new condition in a matter of 2 minutes or less per blind [plus dry time]. I will be happy to share this with you if you are interested but keep in mind, you will need the right tools to get this done. If you have 20-30 or so blinds, my cleaning method would definitely be worth the expense of purchasing the tools needed. Not many people out there have the time nor the patience to clean one blind a slat at a time, let alone 20-30 of them. If everybody goes in on the tools then shares them, the cost becomes negligible. Just LMK.
Tom