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Thread: Lost my childhood partner in crime.

  1. #1
    Member Sponsor Addicted to Best! Hi-FiGuy's Avatar
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    Lost my childhood partner in crime.

    Found out last Monday my childhood buddy and partner in a lot of ludicrous $hit in decades gone by passed away form cancer at 56.
    We fought like cats and dogs in our youth, sent each other to the hospital for stitches and broken bones at times. We got past that phase and entered chasing girls and building Hot Rods, going to a boatload of concerts, met our wives, had children, got them married and continued the cycle of life.
    Obviously with the growth of our families and moving around the country we saw less of each other but still talked often.
    Last time I saw him I literally physically ran in to him while I was on my morning walk and he came around a corner on his motorcycle and my dumb-a$$ was not paying attention to where I was going.
    We sat on the side of the road and talked for about an hour and was told about his recent diagnosis.
    This was days before moving to Seattle.

    I got a phone call about a year later and it was him telling me about the death of his younger brother and that he himself had been in a motorcycle accident, been in a coma and suffered brain damage.
    I am here to tell you that conversation crushed me as his brother, also a childhood friend was actually his baby sitter during the day while he healed, and to keep him from driving, something the two of us love to do. It was quite obvious that the brain damage was very real.
    We talked for hours about his brother and the motorcycle accident but never a single word about the cancer.
    I met him at age 5 and he is one of 8 kids, good Catholic family, third from the youngest. When you have 10 people living in one house, it gets very busy all the time. This family was part of my everyday life up until I got married and got a place of my own, and constant interaction over the years.

    Sooo....trying to make sense of it all. Things that make you think about life in general.

    His dad has had the personal life experience, privilege and honor of burying his wife and two of his youngest children, the kids in the last two years.
    My heart and soul are crushed.
    His dad and my dad both had literally the same heart diagnosis 40 years ago, had the bypass, and told to change their habits if they wanted to live a long life.
    His dad listened, quit drinking and smoking, started exercising and started eating healthy. My dad on the other hand did exactly the opposite and continued down the same path.So much so that after his third heart surgery when mom and I went to visit him he was in the CCU with an ashtray sitting on his stapled together chest smoking a cigarette===IN THE FRICKIN CCU!=== The nurse even told my mom what an a$$hole my dad was, and he was to be sure.
    So who got the better end of the deal here, my dad who, lived his life on his terms, went with everyone still alive and healthy not having to bury any of his children, or my buddy's dad who is still alive (now deteriorating rapidly I am told) and on Monday bury his second child?
    Cant even entertain the thought.
    Last edited by Hi-FiGuy; 12-01-2017 at 08:50 PM.
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  2. #2
    Member Sponsor Addicted to Best! rockitman's Avatar
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    Sorry for your loss. Losing friends sucks.
    Christian

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  3. #3
    Addicted to Best! marty's Avatar
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    That was a beautiful and heartfelt note. It brought me to tears and I'm not sure I would have felt that way reading that note when I was 40. We are all so...fragile, and it does not seem to go away as we get older. Always hard to lose those closest to you. My sincere condolences.

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    Sorry to hear that. My condolences
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  5. #5
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    Sorry for your loss mate.

    After my motorcycle accident, my life and mindset changed dramatically. As you get older, your priorities change. You no longer think about the next dollar ( or piece of stereo equipment) and your health and time with family/friends becomes more important!
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  6. #6
    Site Founder And Administrator Ron Resnick's Avatar
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    I am very sorry to read of the loss of your friend. May he always remain in your heart.
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  7. #7
    Member Addicted to Best! NorthStar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hi-FiGuy View Post
    Found out last Monday my childhood buddy and partner in a lot of ludicrous $hit in decades gone by passed away form cancer at 56.
    We fought like cats and dogs in our youth, sent each other to the hospital for stitches and broken bones at times. We got past that phase and entered chasing girls and building Hot Rods, going to a boatload of concerts, met our wives, had children, got them married and continued the cycle of life.
    Obviously with the growth of our families and moving around the country we saw less of each other but still talked often.
    Last time I saw him I literally physically ran in to him while I was on my morning walk and he came around a corner on his motorcycle and my dumb-a$$ was not paying attention to where I was going.
    We sat on the side of the road and talked for about an hour and was told about his recent diagnosis.
    This was days before moving to Seattle.

    I got a phone call about a year later and it was him telling me about the death of his younger brother and that he himself had been in a motorcycle accident, been in a coma and suffered brain damage.
    I am here to tell you that conversation crushed me as his brother, also a childhood friend was actually his baby sitter during the day while he healed, and to keep him from driving, something the two of us love to do. It was quite obvious that the brain damage was very real.
    We talked for hours about his brother and the motorcycle accident but never a single word about the cancer.
    I met him at age 5 and he is one of 8 kids, good Catholic family, third from the youngest. When you have 10 people living in one house, it gets very busy all the time. This family was part of my everyday life up until I got married and got a place of my own, and constant interaction over the years.

    Sooo....trying to make sense of it all. Things that make you think about life in general.

    His dad has had the personal life experience, privilege and honor of burying his wife and two of his youngest children, the kids in the last two years.
    My heart and soul are crushed.
    His dad and my dad both had literally the same heart diagnosis 40 years ago, had the bypass, and told to change their habits if they wanted to live a long life.
    His dad listened, quit drinking and smoking, started exercising and started eating healthy. My dad on the other hand did exactly the opposite and continued down the same path.So much so that after his third heart surgery when mom and I went to visit him he was in the CCU with an ashtray sitting on his stapled together chest smoking a cigarette===IN THE FRICKIN CCU!=== The nurse even told my mom what an a$$hole my dad was, and he was to be sure.
    So who got the better end of the deal here, my dad who, lived his life on his terms, went with everyone still alive and healthy not having to bury any of his children, or my buddy's dad who is still alive (now deteriorating rapidly I am told) and on Monday bury his second child?
    Cant even entertain the thought.
    Mike, you told us a beautiful life story in your post; may those precious souvenirs you shared with us live eternally. My thoughts are with you and your friend and families.
    All the Very Best, - Bob --------- "And it stoned me to my soul" - Van Morrison --------- AudiophileAudition

  8. #8
    Member Sponsor [WBF Founding Member]
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    Please accept my condolences.
    Vbr,

    Sam
    SPQCV

  9. #9
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    Sorry to hear about your mate. That will be something very hard to get over, if at all... Main thing is to move on and try to remember and embrace the way he lived. The quality times you both had, family, friends and good laughs, will keep you moving forwards. Also don't forget the music!, it has some pretty strong healing powers when you dig deep into the emotions...
    I was just wondering if your mate had any particular great tracks he would have liked to listened to often? Perhaps if you could let us know, we could play some of these tunes as a form of dedication, if you don't mind.
    Let us know, take it easy and stay safe.
    Low woof - RJ

  10. #10
    Senior Member Pb Blimp's Avatar
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    I am new here and so don't know you but just want to let you know I am sorry.
    Paul

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