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Thread: The WBF humor and joke thread.

  1. #271
    Moderator Moderator treitz3's Avatar
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    Got me, Al. I was talking with my family about this one while they were in another room and I asked them the same questions. When it came to question #4, my wife burst out laughing so hard, she snorted. LOL.

    I live for this kind of humor. still-one's post has got to be my favorite so far in this thread.

    Tom
    In search of accurate reproduction of music. Real sound is my reference and while perfection may not be attainable? If I chase it, I might just catch excellence.

    The best way to enjoy digital music reproduction is to never listen to a good analogue reproduction.

    I post my own opinions except when posting as a moderator in green.

  2. #272
    [WBF Founding Member] audioguy's Avatar
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    The very best bathroom sign ever - and by a long shot!!

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    “Audio as a hobby is dying, largely by its own hand. As far as the real world is concerned, high-end audio lost its credibility during the 1980s, when it flatly refused to submit to the kind of basic honesty controls (double-blind testing, for example) that had legitimized every other serious scientific endeavor since Pascal. [This refusal] is a source of endless derisive amusement among rational people and of perpetual embarrassment for me” - Gordon Holt

  3. #273
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    Audition recordings: Zero Distortion Link; Reference Components: Zero Distortion Link; Own: Lampi GG One-day-to-get: Apogee Scintilla, or a horn (with Tenor 75 OTL ), Preamp to be fit in to suit the gain and drive the power amp. Analog: TBD

  4. #274
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    Audition recordings: Zero Distortion Link; Reference Components: Zero Distortion Link; Own: Lampi GG One-day-to-get: Apogee Scintilla, or a horn (with Tenor 75 OTL ), Preamp to be fit in to suit the gain and drive the power amp. Analog: TBD

  5. #275
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    Audition recordings: Zero Distortion Link; Reference Components: Zero Distortion Link; Own: Lampi GG One-day-to-get: Apogee Scintilla, or a horn (with Tenor 75 OTL ), Preamp to be fit in to suit the gain and drive the power amp. Analog: TBD

  6. #276
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    They may take our seats, but they will never take our freedom!

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    Audition recordings: Zero Distortion Link; Reference Components: Zero Distortion Link; Own: Lampi GG One-day-to-get: Apogee Scintilla, or a horn (with Tenor 75 OTL ), Preamp to be fit in to suit the gain and drive the power amp. Analog: TBD

  7. #277
    Addicted to Best! PeterA's Avatar
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    Grandma Still Drives -- PRICELESS

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    >
    >
    >
    > Grandma is eighty-eight years old and

    still drives her own car. She writes:
    >
    > Dear Granddaughter,
    >
    > The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a 'Honk if you love Jesus' bumper sticker.
    >
    > I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting.
    >
    > So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.
    >
    > Boy, am I glad I did! What an uplifting experience followed.
    >
    > I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn't notice the light had changed.
    >
    > It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed.
    >
    > I found lots of people love Jesus!
    >
    > While I was sitting there, the guy behind me started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed,

    'For the love of God!'
    >
    > 'Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!'
    >
    > What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!
    >
    > Everyone started honking!
    >
    > I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people.
    >
    > I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!
    >
    > There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a sunny beach.
    >
    > I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air.
    >
    > I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant.
    >
    > He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.
    >
    > Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign right back.
    >
    > My grandson burst out laughing. Why, even he was enjoying this religious experience!
    >
    > A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment they got out of their cars and started walking towards me.
    >
    > I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed.
    >
    > So, grinning, I waved at all my brothers and sisters, and drove on through the intersection.
    >
    > I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and felt kind of sad I had to leave them after all the love we had shared..
    > So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away. Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!
    >
    > Will write again soon.
    >
    > Love, Grandma
    My system link on WBF: http://www.whatsbestforum.com/showth...-Sublime-Sound
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  8. #278
    [WBF Founding Member] audioguy's Avatar
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    After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target.

    Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.

    Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

    Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local Target:

    Dear Mrs. Harris,

    Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:

    1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

    3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.

    5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

    6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

    7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

    8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

    9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it, as a mirror while he picked his nose.

    10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

    11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.

    12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look' using different sizes of funnels.

    13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

    14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed; 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

    15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room?

    And last, but not least:

    16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'


    One of the clerks passed out.
    “Audio as a hobby is dying, largely by its own hand. As far as the real world is concerned, high-end audio lost its credibility during the 1980s, when it flatly refused to submit to the kind of basic honesty controls (double-blind testing, for example) that had legitimized every other serious scientific endeavor since Pascal. [This refusal] is a source of endless derisive amusement among rational people and of perpetual embarrassment for me” - Gordon Holt

  9. #279
    Member Sponsor Addicted to Best! MadFloyd's Avatar
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    LOL, my stomach hurts from laughing!
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  10. #280
    Addicted to Best! PeterA's Avatar
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    Best I've read in a very long time. Thanks funnyguy, aka, audioguy.
    My system link on WBF: http://www.whatsbestforum.com/showth...-Sublime-Sound
    Analog: SME 30/12, SME V-12, My Sonic Labs Signature Gold, AirTight Supreme, VDH Colibri Platinum, MINT LP protractor
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